Migration definitely changes your mindset, it gives you more of a balance. You can see how people think differently about certain things and you can make your mind up where you think the best way lies - Mrs Van Den Berg talks about emigrating from South Africa to the UK.
Following your move to the UK, what was it like adapting to a new culture?
My husband and I came to England when we were 29, before we had children, and we had both been in the UK before so we knew what the country was like. So we came here with two suitcases and went from there!
Also, even though South Africa is far away, where I am from the way people do things is very similar. The mindsets of people are very similar, so it was easy to adapt and get on with things and go straight into work. It was not a massive culture change. Also the language was our second language; in South Africa you are taught Afrikaans which is my first language, but in school, right the way through, you are taught English, so you are basically bilingual when you leave school. So communication was easy when we came to the UK.
Do you have any stories about how people have reacted towards you as a migrant?
I haven't personally had any instances where people were mean to me because I was a 'foreigner.' I've had people ask me if the lions walk in the street, or if we had to hunt food, but it's more in a jokey way. To be fair, a lot of people have been to South Africa on holiday or visiting friends, so I think it's more of a known environment; it's not drastically different. I've had a very positive experience in terms of being a migrant.
How far does your experience of migration and living in different places affect your identity?
I think it does over time, definitely, We have been in the UK for thirteen years and I think it does change you. For example, if you mention health and safety to people in South Africa they would think, what? Because they are more laid back there, whereas here everything has safety at its centre - is this being done right, are people protected?
So, I have changed in that sense and I notice it when we go to South Africa for a holiday that I may feel a bit more concerned about my children doing something. Climbing in a tree for example - in England they're often told to come down as they will get hurt, and I've started to be more like that in my own views of what is safe and what is not.
So I think migration does change your sense of identity and your values and you get a sort of wider world perspective about things. A lot of my school friends still live in the town where I'm from which is absolutely fine but some of them have never travelled, so they see things out of their perspective of living that life, whereas we have been further away so we have different world views. So yes, migration definitely changes your mindset. It gives you more of a balance because you can then see how people think differently about certain things and you can make your mind up where you think the best way lies.
I think it does over time, definitely, We have been in the UK for thirteen years and I think it does change you. For example, if you mention health and safety to people in South Africa they would think, what? Because they are more laid back there, whereas here everything has safety at its centre - is this being done right, are people protected?
So, I have changed in that sense and I notice it when we go to South Africa for a holiday that I may feel a bit more concerned about my children doing something. Climbing in a tree for example - in England they're often told to come down as they will get hurt, and I've started to be more like that in my own views of what is safe and what is not.
So I think migration does change your sense of identity and your values and you get a sort of wider world perspective about things. A lot of my school friends still live in the town where I'm from which is absolutely fine but some of them have never travelled, so they see things out of their perspective of living that life, whereas we have been further away so we have different world views. So yes, migration definitely changes your mindset. It gives you more of a balance because you can then see how people think differently about certain things and you can make your mind up where you think the best way lies.
What do you miss most about where you lived in South Africa?
I miss the carefree nature of South Africans. In primary school, children go to school barefoot because it's hot. The soles of their feet get hard so the ground doesn't affect them - that makes it feel more down-to-earth somehow. Another thing I miss is that most people have pools in their back gardens. I spent hours in the pool in the evenings - my hair turned green from the chlorine! The sun beats down on the pool and the water is about 21 degrees, which is cooler than you would expect from an indoor pool here, but because it's so hot outside, diving into that cool pool and swimming for hours is something that almost made my entire childhood - I miss doing that daily.
Another thing I miss is, I think in South Africa people open their homes more to friends - your friend could easily say 'come round for a cup of tea,' whereas in England people seem happy to meet elsewhere like a park but they don't seem too happy to have people in their houses all the time, so I miss that casualness of quickly seeing friends for an hour and popping round. It feels more distant here, but that's just the culture - it's not a bad thing.
I miss the carefree nature of South Africans. In primary school, children go to school barefoot because it's hot. The soles of their feet get hard so the ground doesn't affect them - that makes it feel more down-to-earth somehow. Another thing I miss is that most people have pools in their back gardens. I spent hours in the pool in the evenings - my hair turned green from the chlorine! The sun beats down on the pool and the water is about 21 degrees, which is cooler than you would expect from an indoor pool here, but because it's so hot outside, diving into that cool pool and swimming for hours is something that almost made my entire childhood - I miss doing that daily.
Another thing I miss is, I think in South Africa people open their homes more to friends - your friend could easily say 'come round for a cup of tea,' whereas in England people seem happy to meet elsewhere like a park but they don't seem too happy to have people in their houses all the time, so I miss that casualness of quickly seeing friends for an hour and popping round. It feels more distant here, but that's just the culture - it's not a bad thing.
How often do you go back?
We used to go every year and a half but Covid stopped us for a while. I would like us to go more often but it's getting my husband past that point. There's a lot more danger in South Africa - there are high crime rates. So when you are there, you have to put yourself in a different mental head space and look around a lot more, ask yourself what are people doing, who is there, are you safe, is somebody perhaps going to take a chance to grab your handbag? So that's what my husband doesn't like. When you set foot there, you have to adapt your mind. Things are different there.
We used to go every year and a half but Covid stopped us for a while. I would like us to go more often but it's getting my husband past that point. There's a lot more danger in South Africa - there are high crime rates. So when you are there, you have to put yourself in a different mental head space and look around a lot more, ask yourself what are people doing, who is there, are you safe, is somebody perhaps going to take a chance to grab your handbag? So that's what my husband doesn't like. When you set foot there, you have to adapt your mind. Things are different there.
In your experience how would you describe English attitudes to people from other countries?
In my experience, it's really good. I've got so many friends who never treat me differently because I am not born English. In any workplace I've been in, I've had a very positive experience. People's experiences will differ, but I have felt very welcomed, and I think I have settled into my community as well. You have to make an effort, I feel, when you move to a different country, to really contribute to that society, because it's a gift for another country to allow you to stay there so I think it's your responsibility to become involved and help where you can. So maybe it's also got to do with your attitude, and how you embrace your new country.
What are your most significant memories of the first week in the UK?
The first week we stayed in London and did a lot of sightseeing. It was cold because we'd come from the summer, so we had our coats and hats on...and the crisp air of London was so nice to walk in and see all the landmarks. At the time of us emigrating, we were young, we didn't have children yet so we were free to do as we chose - it was just us. At that age, with no family, you don't really worry and think about what you've left behind, because when we came, we came on visas. We came to work. It wasn't definite that we would migrate for good at that point, we were just seeing where it went.
Finally, what do you think we can do as a school to support students and staff who have migrated from other countries?
Something like this is very special because it shows that you are thinking about the fact that people could be here that have got connections in a different country and might need...(voice breaks) Sorry, I am getting emotional! (Pause) Something like this really shows that you care, and I want to say that it means such a lot to people. I think carrying on with things like this is needed. Bringing feelings out in the open, and letting people have a voice, is really something very special. It's very special what you're doing.
In my experience, it's really good. I've got so many friends who never treat me differently because I am not born English. In any workplace I've been in, I've had a very positive experience. People's experiences will differ, but I have felt very welcomed, and I think I have settled into my community as well. You have to make an effort, I feel, when you move to a different country, to really contribute to that society, because it's a gift for another country to allow you to stay there so I think it's your responsibility to become involved and help where you can. So maybe it's also got to do with your attitude, and how you embrace your new country.
What are your most significant memories of the first week in the UK?
The first week we stayed in London and did a lot of sightseeing. It was cold because we'd come from the summer, so we had our coats and hats on...and the crisp air of London was so nice to walk in and see all the landmarks. At the time of us emigrating, we were young, we didn't have children yet so we were free to do as we chose - it was just us. At that age, with no family, you don't really worry and think about what you've left behind, because when we came, we came on visas. We came to work. It wasn't definite that we would migrate for good at that point, we were just seeing where it went.
Finally, what do you think we can do as a school to support students and staff who have migrated from other countries?
Something like this is very special because it shows that you are thinking about the fact that people could be here that have got connections in a different country and might need...(voice breaks) Sorry, I am getting emotional! (Pause) Something like this really shows that you care, and I want to say that it means such a lot to people. I think carrying on with things like this is needed. Bringing feelings out in the open, and letting people have a voice, is really something very special. It's very special what you're doing.